I feel so defeated. I feel I can't quite understand God. Day after day and night after night I give Him my life, my mind and all that is within me. I trust in Him and like Jesus said I gave Him my burden and picked up His which is light. His words and His promises are a delight to me but when placed side by side with what I am going through it just does not add up. Here I am thanking and praising God for giving me another opportunity to have my greencard appeal reviewed and here it is again, after all my prayers and your received a letter a few days ago saying that they are rejecting it again. How do you continue to trust and pray after trusting and praying for all these months which has now turned into years. I need a place to live, I need to be restored to the job I used to do. I need the new beginning that God promised me. He said He will help me and He will answer my pray but it seem that man has the last answer and God has yet to intervene.I need so much to go back to the place where I walked with God and He walked with me. Where His words are true and final in my life, where man has no dominion in my life but God. Through all of my hurt and all of my pain I will lose my life for Christ. I prefer to have nothing that to have everything without God in my life. I love Him so. Please pray for me.
I am expecting a letter anytime now that the greencard apple will be denied.. again. I have no job as of last Thursday and my finances is in the gutter. Where is God when I need Him?